“In the silence you are speaking in the quiet I can feel the fire and its burning, burning deeply.”  This is one of my favorite lines from a Jason Upton song "In the silence" Click HERE. 

With all the noise and business it is so hard to really listen.  Someone once told me there is a difference between hearing and listening.  “You hear me, but you are not listening.”  It is easy to hear a lot of different sounds and voices these days.  Seems like there is always noise.  Kids, TV, Phones, Music, people talking, thoughts whirling. 

I want to encourage you to really try to make five or ten minutes of quiet.  Quiet.  Just peace.  Quiet is the sound of nothing, but it is also the sound of something refreshing. 

In the silence He is speaking.  Listen.  Quiet your mind, heart, and soul and listen.  He is there in the stillness in the quiet burning.  

STOP

Every Friday Kate Montaung host a beautiful twitter party. #fmfparty You should really stop over and check out all the other incredible ladies post who going us. AH -mazing writers over at her place.  She gives a prompt word and we get to write for five minutes.  Free of any restrictions, just write.  

First things First

If you don’t know what Five Minute Friday it is an insanely fun party that happens every Thursday night via twitter.  Kate is gracious and hosts a link up party at her place every week. (Check her blog out HERE) We are given a word prompt and then we set the timer for five minutes and type our little fingers away. 

So this is the first one of the 2016-year. 

First.

First off let me be the first to admit I kind of have a love hate relationship with the New Year.  I feel like I lie to myself, with good intention but with no real plan of action.  I am kind of over the New Year and new beginnings.  I feel like everyday is a new beginning.  Don’t get me wrong I do like the feeling of starting fresh.  A new slate, but this year I just want genuine heart change.  

I want to have God goals and not just good goals.  I want to seek him more than ever to find out his plan and partner with him to see His plan come to pass in my life.  Honestly, I haven’t even made any goals for this year yet.  I kind of feel guilty that I haven’t made any.  I kind of lack the motivation to even make goals, because I'm tired of feeling like a failure.  

I guess this year my goal is to just simply seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and trust his promise that he will add everything else unto me.  Everything that I need he will add to my life as long as I do my part and that starts with me seeking him first.  So I guess the first thing I am doing on the start of this New Year is to seek him first. Plain and simple I need him first.  First and foremost I need him.

Earlier this week my heart burned with green ency.  I wrote about my struggle with jealousy.  After writing the piece I received so much encouragement.  I have to admit that it felt good to know that I was not alone in my struggle, but the only thing that relieved my burden was when I wandered into his presence.

It is only in his presence that my heart is healed, my soul is restored, and I can lie in green pasture and see growth all around me.  I am so thankful he is the author and finisher of my faith.  I can see growth all around me when I set my eyes on the creator and not myself and others.

My heart yearns for Him in a dry and weary land.  I am eager to continue growing.  I know I have not arrived into the full scope of who I am called to be, but I am learning I do have something to offer.  Growth takes time.  Those green blades blowing in the wind of His spirit offer my eyes a visual insight of my heart. 

The enemy would like weeds to fill my heart and choke out His work, but I call on him and drink deep of his love and rest in his green, green, pastures of growth and health.  I am growing, I am strong, and I am green with health not envy. Every step of the way he is there, guiding me and leading me into his plan for my life. 

Father, thank you for offering me forgiveness instead of judgment.  Thank you for removing envy and replacing the emptiness with growth and love for you.  Thank for mercy.  Thank you for revealing weeds and uprooting them with strength and power.  I know you are not finish with me and that I do have a lot to offer.  That growth takes time, and so does honing gifts and talents.  I look forward to all that you are going to do in me. 

"Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus, just to take Him at His word. "I have sung this hymn a hundred times over and yet there are days I question, "Do I really trust Him?  Is it really sweet to trust when all seems lost?". 

There are things this side of heaven I do not understand.  I will never begin to be able to understand.  I can also promise you, I will never downplay the events that have unfolded in your life.  Your story is vast with contradicting circumstances.  What do I do when the pages of my life do not reflect the promises typed on pages of an aged, leather book? 

My life laid bare for all to see, I am learning in the good, bad, and ugly events of my life they are not what inspired the written truths in that leather bound book.  The events that inspired the authors of truth didn’t always shine with glory either but Glory always shown on the faces of those who trusted Him. 

In the last year I have taken a journey with my most trusted friends and family through The Story.  The most life-altering journey thus far was learning there is always an Upper story and a Lower story. 

My family was torn apart at the age of three.  You can read more about this HERE.  Anyhow, after the murder of my mother and the incarceration of my father you can only imagine how the circumstances of these events could leave me with thousands of questions.  Many of the questions I had left me dumbfounded, angry, sad, depressed, and even feeling forgotten.

I think it is easy for us all to feel forgotten at some point in our life especially by our family members.  Whether this feeling comes by tragic events, divorce, death, jobs, or being silenced and ignored as a child or because they don’t agree with your life choices what ever the reason you may feel forgotten today, the Lord is asking you a question.

“Can a woman forget her nursing child

and not have compassion on the son of her womb?”

The answer may or may not shock you,

As a mother of two small children, I am absolutely head over heels in love with them and cannot imagine ever forgetting and forsaking my children.  However, I know it happens to many.  IF I could reach through the screen right now, cup your sweet face, and tell you, "I cannot explain why, I cannot fathom the reason but I know your pain.  I know it hurt, and still hurts, but there is one who will adopt you as His and fill your heart with the love you always wanted.  He will care for you, and embrace you.  His love will bring healing to your life and joy to your heart.  He will never forget you and you will always have a place in His heart.  You are engraved on the palms of His hands an your walls will always be before him.  You are the apple of His eye and he thinks about you obsessively, knowing ever hair on your head and catching every tear that falls from your cheek."

“Surely they may forget,

Yet I will not forget you.”

Isaiah 49:15

While there were many times in my life where I felt forgotten, not necessarily by my mother or any of the family left to raise me, but mostly by the Lord he would remind me of this truth.  Though you may be forgotten by others, parents, siblings, teachers, friends, a boyfriend, I, the LORD will never forget you.  I will never forsake you, and I will adopt you in as my own.  (Romans 8:15)

The family he adopts us into is the greatest family on this side of heaven. The cool thing about adoption is that once you are adopted you can never be “unadopted” (excuse my word I made up.) meaning while I can give up my rights to my birth children at any time I would like if I adopt a child I can never give up my rights to them, I am stuck with them. 

You my friend have an opportunity to be adopted by the God of the universe and He will never grow tired of you, or give up his rights to you.  He wants to be stuck with you forever! You are his forever and always.  If you feel forgotten or maybe you are not sure where you belong, you can leave here today with some answers to your questions.

Do I belong?

YES; yes you belong more than you know.  Right here in His arms and His family!

Am I forgotten?

YES and NO.  Yes man will forget you, but the Lord will never forget you.  You belong.  You are wanted.  You are adopted into His family.  You are secure.  

He will never give up His rights to you. 

I am joining with many other fabulous writers over at Kate’splace where every Thursday she hosts a twitter party (#fmfparty).  We connect, catch up, and look forward to the word prompt given every Thursday night.  After the word prompt is given we set a timer for five minutes and go to town. We meet up at her place and link up and share our thoughts on the word prompt.  

Last night’s word prompt was: FAMILY. 

I’m thrilled to be able to still link up and join her party while keeping with my 31-day topic. You can find all of my post here for this year’s challenge and last years post can be found here.