I have had the privilege of getting to know Wendy Speake over the last year and a half via her Facebook Group (click here).  She is filled with wisdom, gracious, and kind.  I recently had the honor of meeting Amber Lia, who is also knowledgeable, fears the Lord, and who is generous with her insight into raising children.  These two ladies are the forerunners of a movement, leading women out of frustration and anger, into love and kindness enabling us as mothers to lead our children to Christ and repentance.  

I have been able to work behind the scenes with many others as they prepare to release their book TRIGGERS.  Humbled is an understatement when I was invited to participate in a pre release study with them.   As they dissected chapter after chapter and led hundreds of women through TRIGGERS, (we all have or will face at some point in our parenting journey) I slowly found the atmosphere of my heart transforming along with countless other mothers.  It is with great joy that I join in celebrating their labor of love.  Prayers have been whispered tears have been shed and our greatest desire is that TRIGGERS will empower you as a mother, restore the joy and honor of parenting, and transform your heart and home.

Would you welcome Amber and Wendy today as we get an inside look into their hearts and lives.

WHICH OF THE TRIGGERS IN THIS BOOK CHALLENGES YOU THE MOST?

Wendy: Without a doubt, it’s chapter 15, sometimes daily. It’s easy for me to get into a negative pattern, wondering, “When will my children ever change?!” Writing this chapter was absolutely me preaching to my own heart. What I’ve learned is that I’m the one in need of change, over and over again. Does anyone remember the song, “Let there be peace on earth, and let it begin with me”? Yes, that!

Amber: Sibling Rivalry in chapter 7! I feel myself immediately tense and prone to react when they fight amongst themselves, especially if they get physical with one another. It sets me off like nothing else can. I think that the hardest part is taking the time to calmly investigate, and to release the old pattern of thinking that I have to fix everything. Instead of rushing in with a quick punishment, I want to take the time to ask them probing questions that get them thinking about their behavior and reach their hearts. I don’t want them to get along to avoid my angry reactions. I want them to have harmony in their relationships as siblings because they love and respect one another. That can often take an entire childhood.

WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU MESS UP?

Wendy: Goodness, couldn’t this be a whole chapter in a whole other book? Of course, the right answer is that I confess my sin to the Lord, and remember that this is why He came — to die for my sin-stained tendencies. Then I humbly go to my kiddos and ask them for their forgiveness, too. We talk about how to treat one another better and then we work to shift our gaze away from those problematic trigger areas and turn purposefully back to the light of our very blessed days! That’s the Sunday School answer, the parenting book answer. However, in real life, sometimes I forget, and I have to put myself in time-out for a bit so that I can calm down first. This is huge for me. When I sit in my “time-out chair,” I can meditate on what is true and lovely and right and pure in our sweet family.

WHAT INSPIRED YOU TO WRITE THIS BOOK?

Amber: Wendy and I were leading a series about the most common triggers toward anger in our private Facebook group for moms who struggle with anger and yelling. It was clear from the get-go that this was a huge need! Moms needed a good balance of biblical insights and practical helps to combat their most common triggers—like back talking, messy houses, and exhaustion. We all needed to rewire our thinking to consider that triggers could equal opportunities instead of temptations that set us off and harm our kids.  Every day, we felt the Holy Spirit moving in the group, and the women responded so transparently and honestly to our encouragement that we knew early on that we wanted women outside this group to be blessed by Triggers, too. As soon as I mentioned the idea to Wendy, she immediately agreed, and Triggers was born!

AMBER LIA

A former high school English teacher, Amber is a work-at-home mom of 3 little boys under the age of 8. She and her husband Guy own Storehouse Media Group, a faith-friendly and family-friendly TV and Film production company in Los Angeles, CA. When she’s not building sand castles with her boys on the beach, or searching for Nerf darts all over her house, you can find Amber writing to encourage families on her blog at Mother of Knights.

WENDY SPEAKE

Wendy Speake is a trained actress and heartfelt Bible teacher. She tells stories both on page and stage that allow her to point women toward Jesus on their hardest mothering days. You can follow along at WendySpeake.com or find her regularly as a guest at The MOB Society. Wendy resides in sunny San Diego with her handsome husband and their three ruddy boys. 

I hope you have enjoyed getting to know the authors a little bit better.  Don't forget to purchase your copy at any of the links below, and share with another mom.  

To purchase your copy you can go to: 

The Mob Society
Amazon
(all links to purchase book are affiliate links)

Join me tomorrow as I share another inside look, Chapter 16: Lack of Faith, and how lack of faith can diminish our influence over our children and how we lead our homes.  Did you know your lack of faith could be one of the main TRIGGERS in your heart and home?

It’s LAUNCH DAY for my friends Wendy and Amber.  I have been praying, planning, and preparing for this day alongside my friends for a few months now.  I wanted to give all my readers an inside peak into some of my favorite quotes from their book and provide all the links you need to get your copy today!

“As mothers, we forget that our kids are immature.  Yes, they will also be out rightly defiant at times; but I find that often we are dealing with our own unreasonable expectations for obedience.  These expectations lead to biting and cutting punishment, instead of training our children in the way they should go by pointing them to Christ.”

“Whining is not a sin, it’s merely a sign: 

A sign that they still have a few things to learn.”

“Peacemaking moms produce peacemaking kids."

Each chapter is jammed packed full of scriptures and sound wisdom on how to direct our hearts and our children’s hearts to the Lord.  I also love that every chapter ends with a prayer to help navigate our overwhelmed hearts into His presence.

Here is one of the prayers from the book,

 “Dear God, You want all of Your children to be obedient.  I know that when we obey You, we receive blessing and You are glorified.  Father, I want to raise obedient children, but I also want to model obedience to You in my own life.  Help me to see my kids through Your eyes and to be their enthusiastic coach, lovingly pointing them to Your standards with grace and truth, instead of anger.  Replace my frustrations with mercy.  Make me slow to anger!  Help me to run alongside my children, championing them and loving them well, even when they disobey.  May we all be more like You, Lord Jesus!  Thank You for Your promises to help me 

become a godly mom!

In Jesus’ name,

Amen!”

Join me back here tomorrow for an exclusive interview with the authors of TRIGGERS.  And don’t forget to get your copy today.  Join us as we start a movement of transforming the way we mother our children as we learn how to exchange our anger for gentle Biblical responses.

Purchase your copy

Here at The Mob Society

Here at Amazon

(All links to purchase books are affiliate links.  I did not receive any pay from the authors to write this post.)

Your life is a gift.   I'll never forget the day my husband and I thought it would be a good idea to give our oldest sons legos.  Legos people of all things, legos.  I also remember the day I made the biggest regret of my life, I'm just kidding but SERIOUSLY (Insert biggest sigh of aggravation you can imagine).

When I chose to give Jude an entire tub of legos, I knew what I was doing.  I knew exactly what was going to happen.  I knew he would dump them out, I knew there would be messes, I knew I would stumble and I knew there would be great amount of suffering felt all the way from the bottom of my foot to the top of my head.  His gift, that I gave him, would cause me inconvenience, frustration, and hurt me.  I also knew I would have to spend time helping him clean up his legos.  None of these things, kept me from giving him a gift. 

I also knew, his gift would bring him joy, sharpen his motor skills, develop creativity, teach him to share, how to navigate through challenges and difficulties.  I knew his gift would add to his developmental process, maturity, growth and an abundance of memories.  This gift would not only enrich his life but others who came into his life.  I knew this gift would help shape and mold the way he thought, his decision-making skills.  He would learn balance, and stability, experience high emotion of completing a building, dreaming a dream, and learning that he could if he tried.  I desired for him to learn hard work pays off.  There are many more things this one gift would bring him and me.  I knew this gift would grow with him.  He would enjoy this gift for years. 

I wonder if this is the way our Father sees the gifts he gives us in our life.  He knows the ends and outs.  He knew what he was doing when he gave us the gift of our life, just like he knew what he was doing when he gave us the gift of his life.  Your life is a gift.  Your life though difficult, frustrating, and painful at times, is a gift.  You are a gift.  He knew you would make a mess with your gift, just like I knew my oldest would make a mess with his gift.  Your mess didn’t deter him from blessing you.  He like I as a mother also knew he would have to come in and help you clean your mess up. 

I often tell my son, “Don’t be afraid to ask for help.”  In this life you are going to have many troubles, but Jesus said he was going to leave us peace, and a comforter.  Don’t be afraid to ask Holy Spirit, the Great comforter, for help with your gift, your life. 

Maybe you need help cleaning up your mess.  Maybe you need help trying to navigate through emotions you are feeling from the frustrations of your gift.  Perhaps you are agitated with the one you are forced to share your gift with AKA your husband or family member. Could it be you need insight on how to creatively use your gift, your life, in a way that brings joy and fulfillment to others around you? 

I want to leave you with this, life is a gift, life is messy, but don’t be afraid to ask for help.  He knew, and yet he still decided to give.  Don’t quit giving.  Don’t quit living. 

“Hurry mom! I don’t want to be late.” 

Excitement and worry filled the air.  This was the day he had dreamt of for weeks.  Rumors spread like wildfire, and this was his chance to see, really see for himself.  Eagerly he packed his bag and rushed out the door.  Forgetting all about the breadbasket, filled with two fish and five barley loaves, his mothered chased after him.  

“You almost forgot your lunch.  Now make sure you remember to give thanks, sit quietly, and listen with all your heart.  I want to know everything this Messiah has to say.”  

Moist lips pressed against his dusty cheeks and left an imprint of her love. 

“I hope I packed enough.  I hope he doesn’t get lost.  I hope this Messiah is the Christ.”  She held her breath and watched as her only son drifted out of sight.  Exhausted from a laborious morning she hurried back in side.  Feelings of insignificance filled her heart, as she began cleaning the clay pots.  Wiping sweat from her brow she bent low and whispered a prayer.

“Lord, our people are in need of a savior.  We have heard prophecies for years now, of a coming King, one who will save us.  If we have found favor in your sight would you come and make known to us this Christ, our fathers have told us of?  Please protect my oldest has he leaves to search out the mysteries he’s heard of.  Open his ears so he may hear truth, and his heart to receive grace from the heavens.  May his eyes behold the Anointed One, chasing doubt out of his heart.  Please, oh please send provision for our house, I didn’t want to tell him that was our last bit of barley and fish for fear he would not go.  If he’d known he would’ve gone out to fish instead of seeking out truth.  I’m trusting you today committing my house, son, and all I have into your hands.”

Are you there yet?  I can see the scene playing out in my head.  I can only imagine this mom is weary, fearful, and tired.  Perhaps you are the same as this mother.  Exhausted, clinging to a whisper, holding tightly to a promise you are not sure will come to pass as you hold your breath and say a prayer.  You work day and night feverishly without complaint and wonder, “will it be enough?  Does it even really matter, no one even see me or know how hard I work.” 

The sweltering sun was dropping quickly and still no sign of her son.  Dusk clothed the sky with gray blankets of clouds, and worry began to fill her heart.  “I knew I shouldn’t have let him go alone.” 

Rubbing dirt from her eyes, tears filled her eyelids.  Bewilderment flooded her heart as she hurried out the door.  Dust trailed behind her as she approached what looked like twelve men carrying large baskets.  Dropping his breadbasket, her son sprinted to her, shouting, “He’s real, he’s real, he’s real!” 

Confused, excited, relieved and filled from head to toe with wonder she welcomed the men into her home.  Their voices heightened, each trying to talk over the other, and laughter filled the air as they told of the miracle which had taken place, all because she packed her son a lunch.

I know you are tired.  I know you are full of doubt.  I know you contemplate whether or not your menial task mean anything at all.  I know for sure I struggle with these same emotions.  But I will never forget the day Holy Spirit revealed to my weary heart the star role of this story.  I had been asking these same questions, with tears in my eyes when he showed me this story.  I have heard this story hundreds of times, listened intently to sermons chalk full of insight, but I had never given any thought to the hidden character, the mom. 

See mom I know you feel forgotten, I know you feel left out at times, I know you feel like nothing you do (laundry, prepping lunches, mopping, filing files at the office, offering taxi services to friends, staying up late working on projects, and deadlines) really matters, or that you even matter.  BUT she mattered.  She prepared a small lunch for her son that day and sent him on his way to find truth.  Believing and begging he’d find truth for himself and her. 

Preparing a lunch is as important as preaching a sermon, writing a book, leading volunteers, traveling the world, and countless other prestigious things you can think of.  She prepared the provision for a miracle that morning.  Now I don’t know for sure they brought all of the leftovers back to her home, just like I don’t know for sure she sent her son with the last little bit they had, but I do know no matter how small the sacrifice or large he will multiply it to meet your needs.  I’d like to believe they did bring the leftovers to her home that evening.  Because wouldn’t that be just like Jesus to return back to her a hundred fold of what she had sown? 

Maybe you have a story of miraculous provision in your life I’d love to hear it, would you share with me a day He turned your small offering into a great story of how he can use anything to feed starving souls.  

Perhaps you have a story of errand running ending up in a day of salvation for a hungry soul, or how filing charts at the dentist office gave way to sharing gospel with a stranger.  I’d love to hear how he used your “fish and bread” to feed someone.