I can dance, Do you love me NOW? PART 2

12:42 PM



Surrounded by friends, to the naked eye, who had perfect lives.  I developed a foolproof plan.  I would simply follow their example.  If this “Savior” I had found didn’t care about me then I refused to waste another minute trying to please and care about Him.  The enemy now had me tied to him like a puppet.  He was the puppeteer and controlled every move I made.

Entangling myself in the ways of this world, I began drinking, smoking, and chasing approval from unhealthy relationships with various guys and seeking acceptance with a crowd of friends who like me, were stumbling through life aimlessly being controlled from the master puppeteer. 

Lying, sneaking around, hiding, dancing the night away at clubs (I know I can’t dance, I was humiliated to be there), however I would risk self-humiliation in exchange for love and in order to find a new “savior.”  Spring break came and all it took was one invite and I was in the car headed out of town.  How I was able to continue on this path for a year or more without being raped, kidnapped, or killed is beyond my understanding other than HIS glory Protects. 

His glory not only protected me the night my father murdered my mother, HE protected me while I ran from HIM.  His glory will HUNT you down, HIS glory PURSUES you.  He started on a high chase pursuit once I was conceived, and hasn't stopped. He will NEVER stop pursuing us.  HE saw the enemy lure me into darkness and He was right behind following, watching every move, waiting for my return.  Blinded by my anger and frustration I was not able to clearly see.  I had no idea He was chasing me, pursuing me, protecting me yet again in my life.

His LOVE is not and will NEVER be a conditional love.  Even when I had left him, let him down, dishonored him with my life HE LOVED ME.  He has loved me, you from the beginning of time and will ALWAYS love you, love me.  Even if you make your bed in hell, HE IS THERE.  (Psalm 139) Where can I hide? 

"I CAN NEVER HIDE FROM HIM ONLY IN HIM!"
~ Laura Mitchell ~

I so badly wish I could come through this computer screen and HOLD you, HUG you, WIPE your tears and WELCOME you HOME!!  HE. IS. HERE. And HE. IS. ENOUGH. He REDEEMS you, LOVES you with an EVERLASTING LOVE based only on HIS LOVE that is UNCONDITIONAL.  He is Perfection and He is our HOPE.  We can ANCHOR ourselves in HIM.  He lived perfectly because we could not.  He died in exchange for our messy lives, and poured out His love on our hearts.  I will love HIM in return with an UNCONDITIONAL love.


If my world shatters today, I will love you.  If my marriage is on the rocks, I will serve you.  If my children are running I will love you, trust you.  If I suffer unspeakable loss I will serve you.  I will love you with an everlasting love because you have poured out your everlasting love over my life.
Besides where else can I go?  Who has and will continue to love me with an unconditional everlasting love?  

I am free from performance driven love.  I no longer worry about being good enough, He is GOOD enough.  I have let go of placing conditions on His love.  I choose now to honor Him with my life and love Him despite the world we live in.  This world is broken.  This world is not my home.  This world will never have my heart.  My heart was won. If home is where the heart is, than for me home is in His arms.

I will live by the fruit of the spirit and no longer live by the frustrations of the flesh.  Perfection is not a fruit LOVE however is and it births JOY.  It is my JOY to honor, love, and serve Him.

You Might Also Like

22 comments

  1. It has really been laid on my heart this week that Jesus is standing at the door knocking already. We don't have to go looking, we just have to open the door!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. YES! I love that He is always there, with us, He never sleeps or slumbers!!!

      Delete
  2. Thank you for sharing your encouraging thoughts.

    I don't think I'm completely 'free from performance driven love' yet, but God loves me whether I'm successful or not.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oh Romi, there are some days I know I am not completely free, and he quiets my martha heart and reminds me to slow down! He loved Martha and Mary. His grace increased all the more even in our success and failures!!! HUGS!!!

      Delete
  3. Laura, what a powerful story and witness to God's never-ending pursuit of us! What a story of redemption and JOY! I am so glad your blog was one I was blessed to read. Seriously! Blessed to read how God can Turn It Around!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you so much, when I began I am sure like many first time bloggers I was terrified to share. But then it was like a well in my soul and I just couldn't hold back any longer! I am so blessed by your kind words. He is so Good and Faithful! I can see His hand more clearly now than ever before. Hind sight is 20/20. :)

      Delete
  4. Wow and wow...thank you for sharing all your passion and faith and trust in God on this post. Amazed at your passion for God and conviction of His pursuit of us.
    So glad I found your blog today!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! I sometimes wonder if I come on to strong ha ha lol I just can't help myself. He has done great things and my heart will sing! I want everyone to experience the same kind of redemption, hope, and freedom I have.

      Delete
  5. wow wow. This is so intense. His love is unconditional and always there.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes I read Hind's feet in High Places it is a really old book, but it gave me a whole new level of revelation and understand of His love for us.

      Delete
  6. Wow. Very powerful post. I especially liked "If home is where the heart is, than for me home is in His arms."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you for taking the time to read! Yes there is no place I'd rather be!

      Delete
  7. Wow! It sounds like He has protected you from a lot. What a testimony of his grace and the fact that you can be writing all this so courageously. It is very powerful. I am glad you shared.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you, It is by His grace. I guess my mom knew exactly what she was doing when she gave me my name, Laura means victorious. He has made me victorious, I and you and everyone He redeems He makes an overcomer!! WOW He is so good!!!

      Delete
  8. The depths with which you have encountered God come out in your words in a passionate beautiful way. He is enough. He is more than enough.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Kristi, that means the world to me!

      Delete
  9. So thankful His love is unconditional! Thank you for being brave and sharing your story. Love what you say here... We can never hide from Him only in Him. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Denise, you are most welcome. Thank you for taking time to read. That part came straight from His heart, it rocked my world its my favorite part!

      Delete
  10. Laura, I am in awe of your love and your challenge. I am one that pursues my relationship with God. I am so glad I found you today. Blessings. DIANA

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am thankful the Lord is bringing you into my life and so thankful I took this challenge it has changed me in many different ways. I am excited to continue to meet new readers and develop friendships and community.

      Delete
  11. Wow, Laura. The words you wrote are so powerful and passion-filled. Just beautiful. Yes, He does pursue us and will never stop. Great word today, friend!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you! I love that He never stops, even in the difficult seasons when we don't understand He is there!

      Delete

Triggers Book

31 Days of Writing 2015

31 Days of Writing 2015
A Journey of a Wandering Heart

31 Days of Writing 2014

Five Minute Fridays